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“Last week my fan club broke up. The guy died.” | Rodney Dangerfield
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“What’s a high class guy like that doing with a low class broad like you?” | Rodney Dangerfield
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“What a neighborhood, I tell ya. No, it’s bad over there. I tell ya, my neighborhood, there’s nothing but killings over there. I went out, I bought a waterbed. There was a guy at the bottom of it.” | Rodney Dangerfield
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“No respect at all. I got hit by a car. I told the guy, ‘Are you blind?’ He said, ‘I hit you, didn’t I?’” | Rodney Dangerfield
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“I can’t lose any weight. I tried jogging, I keep running into restaurants.” | Rodney Dangerfield
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“Are you kidding. I was so fat when I got my shoes shined I had to take the guy’s word for it.” | Rodney Dangerfield
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